Farewell, Baba... May the stars watch over you

"The distance was just over 150 km, but in our hearts it was more."

How do you say your final goodbyes? What do you say to a dying man? What do you say to your person who has loved you since the day you were born, changed your diapers, read you bed time stories, let you win at cards, smiled at your jokes even if they hurt him, what do you say?

What do you say to someone who is much older than you are, seen the life about four times as much as you have, someone who made his life himself, and in all probability made the difference between you being born on a farm or in the city. A person who has contributed to what you are today and what you will be tomorrow. Your first teacher.

What do you say to a person you love so deeply, but standing besides his deathbed you feel awkward. What do you say to a person, you have known your entire life and dont know a single thought running inside his head. What do you say to a person who wont speak back. What do you say to a person, who loves you so much that he cried everytime he saw you, but today with eyes wide open cant summon up a smile on his face.

What do you say to a dying man, how do you tell him it is over. How do you decide when to stop the oxygen and when to bring him home, where he want to close his eyes. How do you play the executioner of God's will. How do you decide when to kill, the one responsible for your presence in the world.

What do you say to his wife, whose tears are uncontrollable, how do you reason with her. How do you reason with yourself, how do you tell yourself to move on and to forget the past. How do you not remember the differences of opinion, and how do you wish for them to go away, how do you turn back time and wipe away those memories of anger and folly. How do you reason with yourself, it wasnt your fault.

How do you control the deep sorrow welling up your heart, how do you wipe away unshed tears or for that matter how do you cry for one who helped shape what you are today. How do you go downstairs and find the will to sit beside his dead body and chant mantras, how do you go to sleep. What do you tell his brother, who expects you to sit next to him and help him through the night with chanting of mantras. How do you switch on your faith in God, and how do you believe there are better things in store for him.

How do you say goodbye to your grandpa?

"The distance was just over 150 km, but in our hearts it was more."

How do I make it untrue?

In all of my glory, and self confidence... this is Void... confused and defeated... hoping the non cynics will fare better than I have.